


Our broken family full of problems

by Multifandom_damnation



Series: Brothers, Remember? [1]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, Guns, My First Work in This Fandom, Nightmares, but there also needs to be more Percy and Vax stuff, i dont know what else to tag, im so sorry, its really not good but I love Percy stuff with Ripley and Orthax and the Briarwoods, sorry - Freeform, uh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-20
Updated: 2018-02-20
Packaged: 2019-03-21 12:27:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13740855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multifandom_damnation/pseuds/Multifandom_damnation
Summary: Percy woke to the cold hard stone of the cavern floor under him, blinking the dreary sleep from his eyes as he looked around in the darkness. He wiped a hand across his face as he tried to calm his whimpering, his panicked, rapid gasps of a cornered animal. In the almost non-existent light in the cavern, they were spending the night in, Percy could hardly see the rest of his party. Save for the slowly dying embers in the residue of a fire, he could not see his friends in the smothering darkness.He heard a sigh, and his hand whipped towards his hip for the Pepperbox, only finding Ripley’s gun in its place. He grabbed it’s handle, hand trembling as he tried to blink away the dancing spots.Still on watch, Percy watched Vax’s sad eyes follow his hand, shaking his head. “Hey Freddy,” He near whispered, trying not to wake his sister with her head in his lap. “Bad dream?”“You could say that,”(AKA Percy is not good with nightmares and Vax is always there to help his family out)





	Our broken family full of problems

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, I'm just saying, I love Critrole. I'm already up to Episode 65 and I've only been watching for a month or something. This is not very good, but I tried very hard and I hope its ok. I just love the whole No-Mercy-Percy thing with Othax and Ripley ect, and I think we need more Vax and Percy friendship fic's, because I love their relationship, and I feel like I should add to the 20 Percy and Vax fics in the archive already. I hope this is alright, I tried my best.

Percy woke to the cold hard stone of the cavern floor under him, blinking the dreary sleep from his eyes as he looked around in the darkness. He wiped a hand across his face as he tried to calm his whimpering, his panicked, rapid gasps of a cornered animal. In the almost non-existent light in the cavern, they were spending the night in, Percy could hardly see the rest of his party. Save for the slowly dying embers in the residue of a fire, he could not see his friends in the smothering darkness. 

Cold took his heart, twisting and gripping and yanking it out though his chest, the ever-present feeling of someone else in his mind intensified in the back of his head- the quiet nooks and crannies in the recess of his mind where he just can’t get to, can’t pull it out but he knows it’s there, knows the quiet wordless muttering like he knows his way around Whitestone, knows his way around a work bench and a library, knows it better than he knows himself but it should be _gone, he_ should be _gone,_ dissolved in the acid pits like the gun they had worked so tirelessly to make- 

He heard a sigh, and his hand whipped towards his hip for the Pepperbox, only finding Ripley’s gun in its place. He grabbed it’s handle, hand trembling as he tried to blink away the dancing spots. 

Still on watch, Percy watched Vax’s sad eyes follow his hand, shaking his head. “Hey Freddy,” He near whispered, trying not to wake his sister with her head in his lap. “Bad dream?” His other hand held a dagger, twisting it between his fingers. His eyes we’re cautiously on Percy, almost as if he hadn’t looked away, had watched him while he slept. Percy wouldn’t be surprised, considering the past few weeks. 

“You could say that,” Percy winced at the hoarseness of his voice, shifting himself so he was next to Vax, his back to the wall. He cleared his throat, trying to get rid of the feeling. The rest of the group were still asleep, and it didn’t seem like anything had changed. Percy shot Vax a questioning look, hoping he would understand without him having to talk more than he needed. 

“Scanlan took the first watch,” he explained, threading his fingers through Vex’s hair. There were a few small braids there already, as though Vax’s fingers got bored while on his watch. “He said you started talking to yourself and making lots of noise, so he cast silence on you. He didn’t want to wake up the others. I’m surprised it wore off actually, he couldn’t remember what level he cast it.” 

Percy cleared his throat again. “Thanks?” 

Vax gave him an odd look, a cross between worry and sadness. Percy didn’t want to meet his gaze, so he instead took to tracing the sleeping outlines of his friends in the dark with his eyes. “Are you alright?” Vax asked eventually, placing the knife back in his belt and latching his other hand into his sister’s hair. “I mean, cut the bullshit. Are you really ok?” 

Vax watched his friend as he sighed, reached up with trembling hands to wipe his face. He turned to him with a shaky grin, hoping Vax couldn’t tell in the dark. “I’m fine,” he lied. Percy had dark circles under his unclear eyes, and Vax couldn’t meet them, afraid that he would be greeted by empty black voids, barren of anything other than fury and vengeance. “I’m feeling much better. I think it was the smoke that was making me feel like shit. I’m good now though.” 

Vax sighed, leant his head back against the wall. “I thought I said cut the bullshit?” 

“I’m not lying, Vax.” The strange, shaking severity in his voice was enough for Vax to look over, watch the shuddering intensity suddenly cross his face, begging Vax to believe him. Vax didn’t. 

Percy broke his stare to turn to the side and cough into his fist, stifling the sound. Vax looked at him concerned. “You’ve still got that cough?” Percy squinted, rubbing his eyes. “That should have stopped ages ago. It’s definitely not a cold. I’ll ask Pike to have a look at you in the morning.” 

“No no no- “Percy started, fiddling with the latch on his satchel of ammo. “It’s really nothing.”

A thumping was rocketing through Percy’s head, a deep booming voice with no volume or words, but he could hear it- feel it- hear the anger, the frustration the desperation in the noise that he claps his hands to his ears for a moment, forcing his eyes closed until the sound dissipates into near nothingness. 

A hand landed on his shoulder and Percy’s eyes snapped open to Vax’s too close face and narrowed eyes that felt like they were burrowing into his soul, the far-away recess in his mind as though he were trying to glare the demon out of Percy. “Percival, you’re not alright. 

Keyleth shifted in the darkness, rolling over to face away from them, her staff knocking softly into the ground as she nudged it. Looking around the cavern, Percy could barely see Grog, snoring in a corner with his great axe dangling loosely from his fingers and drool falling down his chin to land in a gloopy pile next to Scanlan, asleep at his feet. The quiet _plop… plop_ not enough to wake him, but Percy suspected he wouldn’t be happy when he woke up with Goliath-drool all over his face. Pike was lying on Grog, her legs resting over Scanlan’s sleeping form like a queen on her ottoman, face buried deep into the crook of the goliath’s arm. 

Trinket was asleep to his side, and he reached out a hand to gently run his fingers through the thick and slightly matted fur on his back. Trinket gave a low growl in response, leaning into the touch. 

“I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me, Percival.” Gripping his shoulder tightly, Vax turned Percy to face him, forcing him to meet his eye. “ _We_ can’t help you.” 

Percy forced his face to hide the distress, replacing it with foolhardy spite and determination. “Maybe I don’t want your help? There’s nothing wrong, you’re worrying for nothing.”

Vax’s eyes turned cold, and Percy was reminded of the look he got when he wanted to stab someone, slap them at the very least, and Percy shuffled back a small bit. “The last time you said that there was “nothing wrong”,” Vax started, low and gravelly. Percy bit his lip as he heard the voice peak through again, base matching Vax’s own. “You shot off a kid’s hand, murdered many people in the space of a week and became possessed by a smoke demon who you never mentioned to us at any point.” 

Percy winced at the mention of Desmond and raised a finger up to stop him “I was having a bad day- “ 

“That’s not the _point_ , Percival!” His voice slightly echoed in the cavern, making Grog snort snot up his nose as he adjusted himself and Vex grumble something about keeping it down, covering her face with her arm. Vax paused for a moment, waiting to see if anyone would wake up. When he didn’t he continued, keeping his voice down and looking up though his eyelashes at Percy. “The point is that we know that something is wrong, we can see it, and if you don’t start talking to us I don’t know if I’m going to be able to trust you anymore.” 

The wordless voice was almost screaming at Percy and he could feel his arm being forced back to grab Bad News. He didn’t fight it, just pretended he was rubbing the back of his neck, but he could still feel his fingers rubbing the trigger without his permission. “Vax- “ 

“How can we trust you again?” He continued, grabbing Percy’s other hand, the one that had currently drifted down to his belt, fingers thumbing at the latch that held Ripley’s gun. Percy blinked and tried to bring his hand away, but some otherworldly force was holding it, instead making himself smaller and hunching himself inward. “How can you prove you’re who you say you are? How can we be sure you’re not lying to us again?” 

Sighing, Percy tried to meet Vax’s eyes. “To be fair,” he started, cautiously, trying not to provoke anything, “I don’t think I ever really lied. To any of you. I didn’t tell you everything and sure, I kept things to you, but I never _lied_ to you.” 

Vax felt Percy’s hand resisting against his own, could see the startled look in his eye, like a scared dog. With a stab to the gut, Vax realised that he had a similar look when they had found him in that prison cell, and when he had stared listlessly and with empty eyes in the small confines of his chambers in the dungeon of his own castle “That’s almost as bad.” 

Vax watched, _felt_ , as Percy’s hand slowly, shakily, tentatively, unclipped the latch and began to slide the gun from its holster, saw the piercing terror in his face as Percy gasped silently and squeezed his eyes shut, hand shaking and jaw clenched. He looked so much older, Vax decided, than he had a few months ago. Vax didn’t know how that had slipped his notice, how he was only just realising now as he watched his friend wracked with the inner turmoil of resisting a force stronger than himself that should be non-existent. Percy opened his eyes as the gun rattled in his shaking hands, sliding an inch free of its home, his eyes filled with nothing but fear and worry and horror. 

 _Sorrow_ , Vax thought, whipping his hand away from where it rested gently on his friend’s wrist to sweep it under Percy’s hand and remove the gun the rest of the way, yanking it from Percy’s trembling hand and sliding it behind him, away from his white-haired friend. Percy looked at him with grateful, relieved eyes. 

“Percival,” Vax said gently, taking his hand off of Vex’s head and turning his body slightly to face him, both arms out to grab his hands if he needed to. “Be honest. He- it- isn’t totally gone, is it?” 

Biting his bottom lip and lowering his head to the floor, Percy sighed, pausing to gather this thoughts. “It’s not as bad and not as often… but yes. I don’t think… he’s entirely gone.” 

Percy watched as Vax’s face grew guarded, his eyes closing a moment and his fingers curling into his palms. If he had blinked he would have missed it, Vax opening his eyes and his hands and his face almost instantly. “Would you have told me if I hadn’t just seen it?” 

Shaking his head, Percy curled further into himself, pulling his hands away from Vax and tucking them between his legs, his shoulders hunched and his head bowed. Vax felt distraught, realising his friend looked like a scared child who had just got caught doing something wrong. “Please don’t tell the others.” Percy whispered, so quietly that if Vax’s hearing was any worse he wouldn’t have been able to hear it “Please don’t.” 

Sighing, he grabbed onto Percy’s knee, leant forward when he’s tried to slink back into the faraway corner, and dragged him across the rough stone floor towards him, spinning him around so is back was to the same wall as Vax’s’. “Listen, Freddy,” Vax pulled him over, pushed his head down onto his shoulder and shoved his fingers in his friend’s snow-white hair in a not unlike the one in his sisters. “I won’t tell them, I promise, but you need to start telling us things- especially about this.” 

Vax felt Percy shudder at his side, brought him closer as though he might be able to keep in some of the cold. “You’re not…” He paused, taking a deep breath and mulling over his next words, judging how his friend would react, “You’re not... disappointed in me, are you?" 

Dragging the back of his hand gently against Percy’s face, Vax closed his eyes, a sharp burn of pain and worry in his chest festering and burning his insides, Percy so small and sad against him making him want to find the fucking demon again and kill it himself. “No Percival, we’re not disappointed. Never. We’re just worried about you and I know you’re not used to people worried about you, but we do. We care about you.” 

Percy hiccupped, digging his nose into the crook of Vax’s neck and trying to drown out the thumping in his head, like a heartbeat that matched his own, drowning out any ration thought save for _out out out._  

“ _Percy_ ,” Vax’s voice was sharp in his ear, pulling him back. “It’s ok. You’re fine.” 

“Please don’t tell the others.” He whispered again, muffled and broken. “I don’t want them to know. They’re already scared of me- “ 

“No-one is scared of you, Percy.” 

He lifted his head to give his friend a look that said _seriously?_ and raised an eyebrow before he placed his head back down on Vax’s shoulder. “Keylith is. You know she is. I’ve seen the way she looks at me sometimes, everything I do she judges. She doesn’t trust me anymore. Please, don’t tell them.” 

Percy was embarrassed, embarrassed that Vax had to see him begging, that he was so afraid to show the corruption that laced through his body like poison in his blood, scars in his skin. He hated how weak he was, how easy it was for him to break down and give it to his friend in the darkness together. He wanted to mellow in his own self-pity away from the others, in the silent and lonely sanctuary of his room back at the keep, or his workshop where only he had the key. Wanted to throw himself into his work and build guns and arrows and explosives until his fingers bled and his hands were shaking and his body was numb. 

He could hear his own voice shaking. He didn’t want to do it like _this_. 

Vax could feel tears soak slowly into his cloak, felt Percy shaking against him. “You know Freddy,” he consoled quietly, dragging his fingers through his friend’s hair, against the nape of his neck, against his face- like he used to do with Vex all those years ago, when they were so alone their only company besides each other was a _bear_. “You may not believe this, but you can trust us. And sure, maybe Keyleth is a bit sceptical, but we all trust _you_. You don’t always have to be alone in this, you can talk to us, we can help you. We only question you because we _worry_ about you, we don’t want a repeat to happen again, so we just… we just want to make sure you’re safe because you mean _so much_ to us, and we would never forgive ourselves if anything were to happen and we could have stopped it.” 

He could feel his fingers trace over some of the mish-mash scars that were hidden under his hair, bumps beneath his fingertips. He closed his eyes and tried not to imagine Ripley bleeding out at his feet, her throat slit and daggers finding a new home in her chest, just for an instant, before blinking back to him in a puff of smoke for him to start again. 

Percy was silent against his neck. After a moment, he took a long, shuddering breath and looked up at Vax through tear covered eyelashes. “I’m… Am I not a problem? A nuisance? A loose cannon?" 

Chuckling softly, Vax bent his head to place it against Percy’s. “Oh, I’m not saying that. You’re all of those things. But you know what? So are we. That’s why we’re here, together. A family. We’re all troublemakers, rule breakers, loose cannons, problems and pains in the ass. We’re all a bit broken. But we all found each other, and now we can be all those things together instead of alone. Ok?” 

Percy slowly nodded from Vax’s shoulder, the tears and the shaking subsiding, the darkness and the deep wordless voice dissipated and replaced with a bright flashing of content. “Ok.” He whispered back, feeling a long jagged scar under his nose on Vax’s neck, silently wondering where he got it. 

Suddenly, Vex darted up from her place in her brother’s lap, nearly head-butting him in the chin as she did so, making both Percy and Vax sit up and look to her in concern. She rubbed her eyes, blinking, and her hand trailed down to the braids Vax had threaded into her hair, following the curves and neatly folded lines with her fingertips. “Good work.” She mumbled before she lied back down and went back to sleep, as though nothing had happened. 

Both boys chuckled, Vax winding his fingers back in his sister’s hair and Percy rubbing the tears from his eyes. Bending down, Vax placed a kiss on his sister forehead, smoothing the hair back down. Looking over at Percy, he leaned over and placed one on him as well, Percy blinking quickly taken aback by the sudden pair of lips on his brow, and stayed still as Vax pulled back and smiled kindly at him, the previous coolness and worry replaced now with nothing but love and… pride? “You’re like a brother to me, Percival.” Vax said quietly.

 Closing his eyes, Percy felt content as Vax put his hand on the side of Percy’s head and pulled him back in to rest on his shoulder.  “And you’re one to me, Vax. I’d say a light in the darkness but I feel as though we’re the darkness and the others are the light, as cliché as that sounds.” 

Vax chuckled. “You’re right though. We can always rely on them to pull us back when we need them to.” He closed his eyes, leaning his head back against the cave wall behind them. “In this family of problems.”

Percy could feel himself drifting, his eyes falling shut, his breathing slowing as darkness threatened to take him once again. Not the whispering darkness, but a comfortable and soft one filled with images of his family and his friends and everything that means anything to him. “Our little family of problems…” he repeated quietly, his voice already fading.

Vax felt Percy start to go limp and laced his fingers back into the head of snowfall, so white Vax used to joke that it was almost blinking in the sunlight, dulled due to the dust and dirt and soot that littered it. “Goodnight, Percival.” 

“Goodnight Vax.” 

With two of the people he cared about most on either side of him, Vax prepared himself to stay up for the rest of his watch to the backtrack of their steady breathing and their heartbeats.

* * *

 

Keyleth woke up for her watch, rubbing her eyes and stretching, using her staff to stand and crack her bones. She searched the cave for Vax, asking why he hadn’t woken her up for watch, turning and pausing in her search. She blinked the tears from her eyes, seeing Vax with both his hands hidden in hair of different colours, asleep. Percy’s face was lax, tear-stained and troubled, Vex’s mouth wide open and her hair in a fizzy braid. 

Walking over to them, Keyleth brought over Vax’s blanket, still tucked away in his pack and placed it over them, trying not to shift them too much from their sleep. She walked quietly to the mouth of the cave and sat down on a rock, facing the outside to watch the sun soar about the trees in the horizon, keeping an eye on the broken 3/7 of her family that we’re quietly, slowly, trying to put themselves back together.

**Author's Note:**

> This is set in a random point between the Briarwood and the dragons (befoe Vex dries and Percy's and Vax's relationship basically died) and before I know they were going to tree-stride home, so I hope this is ok!!! I know it probably doesn't make any sense and that everything is wrong but I TRIED DAMN IT!! <3


End file.
